Magic and Me

In my first post I talked about how divination, magic, and energy work fit into Christianity. For this post I’m going to talk about what this means for me in my practice.

Divination wise I primarily use two techniques. First is with bibliomancy: divination with the Bible. There are different ways to do this, I generally use a random number generator to indicate what book to look at. Then depending on the book, I may use the random number generator again to narrow it down further. Sometimes I have a specific question in mind with this technique but often it is done with more of a mindset of seeking what God wants me to think about. I used it for a specific question when I was contemplating the old practice of libations and offerings that were done in the Old Testament. I wondered if God wanted libations from me. I prayed about it and thought about it. And for the next three days, my randomly generated readings included an emphasis on libations and offerings. At that point, I went with yes. Now a few times every month, or whenever I get the urge, I offer a libation to God of red wine. I also frequently burn incense for the Trinity as an offering.

The other technique I use for divination is tarot. Unlike many tarot readers though my deck is specifically dedicated to the Christian Trinity. I pray to Him about a question or situation and ask that if it is His will I will be granted some clarity with the reading. Sometimes I do a weekly draw asking about what I should be aware of for that week. Sometimes I do multiple cards, asking other questions like what I need to be focusing on or what God wants me to do that week.

Magic is one thing I do not practice much. I have done one spell in regards to health. I do not endorse, under any circumstances, doing magic instead of going to a doctor. But I knew enough about the situation to know that the doctors would tell me I had been foolish (I had) and that all they could do was wait and see. I did a spell to support my body healing. I asked a friend more versed in Christian based magic than I for advice. The spell involved an index card with my name on one side, my specific request on the other. I grounded and centered myself next. I placed the index card under a red candle holder with a small green candle in it, the colors for healing and associated with specific Christian angels for healing. I read out loud the verses from psalms she recommended and prayed. Then the candle was lit and I let it burn all the way down. It worked. My body healed for which I am very grateful as if it had gotten worse it would have meant surgery.

I do a lot of energy work. I pray regularly. Both quick prayers-like for patience or strength-and longer communing prayers. I described this second style of prayer to a friend once and she said it sounded rather shamanistic. I always thought of it as a form of visual meditation. I am more likely to have a bit more of a back and forth in this form of prayer. I’m not talking about hearing God speak in terms of a voice in my head. Ideas, inclinations, maybe a fleeting emotion. Sometimes my goal in this is not a conversation as much as to feel a connection to the Trinity.

Other forms of energy work include warding my apartment. I created a few of them with slightly different intentions, tied them to a decorative cross on my wall, and handed the reins over to Jesus. This was after an overnight guest that was more sensitive than I had an encounter with a less than friendly spirit. It flat out ignored me in my room and focused on her in my living room. I am not so sensitive but thought it would be a wise idea to ward my apartment anyway.

I also utilize an amulet, a crucifix necklace that I made. It would work as an amulet whether or not I did anything intentional with it energetically because of the centuries of belief that have been poured into the shape. I also try to remember to cleanse it regularly and charge it with the intention of helping to shield me in my day to day life.

The Eucharist is another instance of energy work. I ground and center and use prayer and energy to bless the wine (and wafers, when I have wafers). In this case, I channel the Trinity’s energy into the wine and wafers before consuming them. This would be an instance of me being different from most Catholics. According to the Church, I cannot do this myself.

©Brightest Twilight

Overall, I feel like these practices have brought me closer with God and strengthened my relationship with the Trinity.

Polytheism with a Brain Injury

Having a traumatic brain injury (TBI) complicates my life in a myriad of ways. For instance, I lost my sense of time. How do I know what day it is or when to plan something? I developed a system of using a calendar, a timer, and a day-planner. I write everything on the wall calendar and in my day-planner. Then I work out the day in my planner, and use my timer. Another part of my system is to anchor my days with regular activity and weeks in the same way. Monday is ironing, Tuesday banking, etc.

How does this work for the Gods of the Month and regular festivals in general? I put the festivals on the calendar and work out the Gods for each. Then I have the God of the Day list in my planner for my daily prayers. I have daily devotions that entail a schedule of regular “Gods of the Week” such as Neptune is always Thursday. This helps me to remember the changing Gods of the Day.

Doing meditation and other things is trickier. I have times when I go into an involuntary fugue state (a form of an absence seizure). When that happens, I need someone to help orient me back to the present world. In that state, I do sometimes have encounters with Gods that I have to piece together. I usually look for daily signs that the particular God did contact me. Once The Morrigan spoke to me in my fugue state. When I brushed the incident off as my imagination, She threw me out of bed. (I landed on my rear.)

Because of my traumatic brain injury (TBI), various forms of meditation are interdicted for me. For example, to meditate by watching a candle flame causes seizures from the flickering. Also, imaging myself a tree reaching to the sky and the earth removes me from reality. The result is that I cannot find my way back. The meditations that are encouraged for people with TBIs involve physical activity that uses both hemispheres of the brain. These types of meditations encourage a healthy brain while being rooted in reality.

What I do daily is cursive handwriting. According to Rudolf Steiner, the founder of the Waldorf Schools, writing in cursive can be both meditative and character changing. Writing a page of Lacy Ls does calm down a racing brain. The repetitive movement across paper by the hand is soothing and serene. It frees the brain while keeping it tethered to reality.

I meditate using activities that anchor my mind to my body. Walking is ideal since it calms me down and promotes better brain health. From my walks around my neighborhood, I learned how to be a nature mystic. Watching squirrels in the trees, as I walk, becomes a meditation on Ratatoskr of the World Tree. Walking keeps me grounded and yet allows for contact from the Gods.

During my weekly walk up and down a long, steep hill, I pondered the houses nearby and their lawn ornaments. As I did, I kept getting messages from my House Lars (Family and Home Spirits) that They wanted a kitchen altar for Their devotions and offerings. The House Lars wanted me to recognize Their efforts to keep my family and home protected.

To ensure that I was not imaging Their Voices, I looked for signs in nature. I kept seeing chipmunks gathering nuts, which I associated with the Lars and Penates (the Keepers of the Pantry). When I got home, I set up altars to both Groups. The one for the Penates is on top of my refrigerator, and the one for the Lars is next to the stove. (I also have one to Venus Cloacina under my kitchen sink. She is the Goddess of Sewers and Purification.)

©Virigina Carper 2019